To Gain Work-Life Balance, Get a Life

Posted by on Apr 4, 2006 in Success!Ezine For You



E. Carol Webster, Ph.D.
Original Copyright © 2006

There’s a reason some people don’t have balance between their jobs or businesses and their personal lives. They don’t have a personal life. Many individuals are starving emotionally and they are starving socially. This may be due, in part, to the fact that families are far flung these days and few people even know their neighbors, robbing them of the kind of stimulation, nurturing and support that was common in the past. This means you have to put energy into building a personal life and many people never get around to it.

  • Work Fills the Loneliness

For many, immersion in work eases the pain of an empty, unsatisfying personal life. It gives you something to do, somewhere to go, someplace to be somebody. People care about you there, fuss over you, and provide opportunities for you to take care of them too. This can seduce you into spending more and more time there – loading you up with more tasks and responsibilities so that you feel too overwhelmed and exhausted to work on any other aspect of your life.

  • Work Becomes Your Identity

In our society, we are all defined in large part by the job we do. But when you’re not doing much else in your life, it can become all that you are. You only feel powerful and productive when in your work role, and feel adrift and purposeless when on your own time. People only know you in connection with your job or business, and you likely have little else to talk about,

  • Get A Life

Step back and take stock of what’s missing in your life. Be frank with yourself and accept that you have to put time into building hobbies, leisure time, and family and personal relationships that are meaningful and satisfying. If there is just too much emotional baggage associated with your relationships to overcome, “adopt” new friends and surrogate family members and put energy into strengthening these. Get involved in community service and charitable activities. Not only will you give well-needed time and attention to others, you will come into contact with people other than your co-workers or clients. Over time, you will have a richer, broader base of experiences that will help you grow as an individual. Give yourself permission to build this side of your life and realize that this is as much a mark of success as excelling in your career.

In order to attain work-life balance, you have to have something in your life other than work.


About the Author:

Dr. E. Carol Webster is a clinical psychologist consultant in Fort Lauderdale, FL
She is author of the book for those dealing with the stress of success ―
Success Management: How to Get to the Top and Keep Your Sanity Once You Get There,

The Fear of Success: Stop It From Stopping You! ―
the book to help you overcome fears that may be holding you back in your life and career
The Private Practice of Clinical Psychology in: Voices of Historical & Contemporary Black American Pioneers
To contact Dr. Webster visit online at or call 954.797.9766.

E. Carol Webster, Ph.D.
Clinical Psychology Consulting
Mailing Address: 7027 West Broward Boulevard, #262  Fort Lauderdale, FL 33317

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