There are lots of folks who want something from you because of your success. They come in all shapes and sizes, and can be skilled manipulators who’ll work hard to get what they’re after. High profilers must be mindful of this because of the number of people who want to be in your network, so be vigilant about the motivations of those around you. Some types of manipulators and their common M.O.’s?:
Charmers – Always Have A Compliment
You probably like the charmers because they flatter you every opportunity they get. They notice your new tie, love your ‘do, and hang onto your every word when you speak. They’re great “yes” men and women, so won’t give you critical feedback ― even when you need it. But are you really this wonderful? Be wary of persistent praise. Pause to question what people want from you. This usually becomes clear after awhile, but the sooner you make this determination, the better for you.
Helpers – Do Anything For You
Helpers work their way into your inner circle because they make themselves indispensable to you. They know what you want before you have to ask for it, and follow through with all tasks quickly and dependably. And they always seem to be around, ready to take care of whatever you need. It’s easy to grow very fond of them, and to oblige when they start making special requests. You probably even throw in generous perks and privileges. But keep an eye on these folks. While some are genuinely “doers” who are devoted to helping you, you can be sure that others are focused only on helping themselves.
Fumers – Constantly Angry And Indignant
That’s right: some people get you to do what they want by using anger. Though you’re not likely to feel like doing much for those who rant and rave, they nonetheless can push you to take action — action that you otherwise may not have taken and that inures to their benefit, not yours. It’s important to understand that many of these manipulators are accustomed to getting their way because people get worn out by their drama, but don’t fall prey to this. Resist the pressure to be controlled by their maneuvers of outrage and indignation.
Manipulators work persistently to get what they want, so stay alert to the motives of those around you. Many genuinely are working on behalf of your interests, but be assured that others are working on behalf of their own.
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About the Author:
Dr. E. Carol Webster is a clinical psychologist consultant specializing in Success Psychology.
She is author of the book for those dealing with the stress of success ―
Success Management: How to Get to the Top and Keep Your Sanity Once You Get There,
The Fear of Success: Stop It From Stopping You! ―
the book to help you overcome fears that may be holding you back in your life and career
The Private Practice of Clinical Psychology in: Voices of Historical & Contemporary Black American Pioneers
E. Carol Webster, Ph.D.
Your Success Psychologist!
Clinical Psychology Consulting
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